Out of the Mouths of Babes

Mrs. Dillard's First Grade is having a linky party discussing all those wonderful things kiddos say.  I just wish I had my notebook at home with me!  I have written so many down over the years.  

Here is a few.  (I did a post on these before so I just copied them here.) 

Alligator Bite?

I have a little kiddo in my room.  He is full of life and very dramatic.  He came in this past week with a large scrape near his mouth.  It was bruised and a little puffy.  I said, "Oh, R.  What happened?"  He proceeded to tell me that he had been looking for mushrooms with his dad in the wood and had gotten whacked by a branch.  I gave him a little sympathy and we went on with our day.  A couple of hours later I sent the kiddos off to lunch.  About 10 minutes later I am walking thru the office and I see R. sitting in the nurses office, patiently waiting his turn.  I said, "R, what's wrong?"  He looked at me, then at the nurse, and said (serious as a heart attack) " Well, you know I got bit by an alligator this weekend and I had to see the nurse."  The nurse got choked up trying not to laugh, and I barely got him back to the cafeteria before I bust a gut!  Another example of why I do what I do!

Random Funnies in Kindergarten

It has been one of those weeks where my K kiddos say the most random things.  It always seems to happen about the time it gets quiet in my classroom and sure enough one of my cuties will pipe up with something random.  Example: R comes up to me and I, thinking he needs help on his work, say "What do you need?" R. says, "Have you felt my muscles?  I think they are getting bigger."  You need to picture him trying to yank a tight long sleeve shirt up to his arm pit to get the full effect.  Another example:  We are creating "How to..." books.  For this we are making a class list of things we know how to do. A. pipes up, "I know how to fold laundry." I agree that this is something to add to our list.  She wasn't finished.  "I even have to fold my dads UNDERWEAR!  They have reindeer on them!"  Now how am I going to face this man again knowing what he is wearing under his britches?  One last one: (this one was said completely out of the blue and with complete sincerity.)Y. says  "I think I need to go to Idaho.  That is where all the cool stuff is."

I love my job. :)

One I just remembered: R. says to J. as they pick up their trash off the floor: Do you know why this is easy for me?  'Cuz I've been working out."

One more.  This one was hard to keep straight faced.  I was just starting out and was working as a para in a first grade classroom.  One student's father was a OBGYN.  During stations one day I heard this little guy pipe up, "Yeah.  My dad knows your mom.  He works on her... (long pause by child as if searching for the right words.  Long stare of horror by myself and the teacher, wondering what will come one of child's mouth)... knees.  Whew!!!